“I managed to become more assertive without being perceived as arrogant by others.”

A woman said to her counselor, “I managed to become more assertive without being perceived as arrogant by others.” Think about it for a minute. Is it possible? I have been an assertive psychologist for 40 years and I haven’t been able to achieve what that woman said she achieved. May be she acquired a perceived imaginary assertiveness (PIA), not real assertiveness. When I crossed the red line and became really an assertive person I acquired the label of the arrogant professor. My closest colleagues, friends, business associates and family members criticized me for doing seances, hypnotizing for past lives and telling students that Newton stole the calculus formula from Leibnitz and ridiculed him for discovering – God! Many of my students were saying, Dr. Kinarthy, he thinks that he know everything.’  The woman getting the counseling above is probably more assertive than she was before the counseling sessions began but she is not really assertive.

Mohammad Ali said he was the greatest boxer in the world years before he won the heavy title in the arena. Are you arrogant if you claim to know yourself or your future? Are you aware of your great knowledge and think you are gifted? I love my so-called arrogance, I help people become great too by giving them answers to questions no one else that I know can give! For example, do you know why 1000 psychiatrists threw eggs at Dr. Freud in a convention in Vienna in 1890? Why was innocent Luigi arrested in 1860 for bringing a tomato to the US? What was wrong with the thinking of Adam Smith? What’s wrong today with the thinking of Obama? Does it have to do with ignorance of psychology? Does he reward bad behaviors around the world without knowing it? Is he stupid? I answer questions others can’t answer: How many units of consciousness constitute an average soul in science? What is God’s body made of? Do you remain 100% yourself  if you lose your legs and 2 arms in a car accident and think you are somebody else? Is an obese person has an obese mind, brain, both? There are millions of questions that professionals can’t answer but I can. Am I arrogant or perfect? I bought Apple, Google, IBM and Facebook years ago for cheap, Am I arrogant to say that I am a gifted investor? Are you perfect if you know the flaws and weaknesses you posses? (the answer is YES). Woman, if your relationship with a man doesn’t work, do you know it has nothing to do with what you two are doing together? Did you know that most of the important decisions in your life you do without enough thinking? In short, if you are called arrogant, laugh it off if you know that you really have the knowledge and skills that you claim to have! Go brag about it, it’s OK. And, about being assertive to the hilt with others, always remember when you feel nervous talking with your boss or other people that the probability is there that they would have sunk the Titanic while you were building the ark.

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4 Responses to ““I managed to become more assertive without being perceived as arrogant by others.””

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